Why Chemistry?

Hi,

This is gonna be super personal and I kinda feel like I need advice. I need advice cos I have been having doubts about what I’m majoring in. Every time, someone asks me about my major and they are just like “wow, so you are gonna be a chemist?” Well, not exactly.

The thing is…

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I don’t know anymore. It’s like my spark for Chemistry died somewhere along the way towards the end of 2015. I haven’t been the same since that year.

It’s not like I’m failing or doing super terribly in Chemistry. According to my high expectations, I am below it but that’s okay. I’m okay with it because I was adapting to a new environment and struggling with so many other issues.

Where did that passion for Chemistry go?

I don’t know.

Is it back now?

I think so.

When did it start? I do know.

It was when I was barely sixteen. I failed all my DPA applications to any business course in any of the polytechnics. By then, I knew I didn’t want to continue with the rigorous studying for A levels. I was never great with national exams or exams with bell curves of any sort, it just wasn’t for me.

One day, I was talking to my Chemistry teacher, she was saying how good Chemistry graduates get paid. After that, I went to do my research, at first I was interested in petrochemicals and oil but realised it is all organic chemistry which I hated back then.

As I further explored the various areas, I found Medicinal Chemistry which I specialised in Polytechnic. The topic interested me because I wanted to give back to the society. I wanted to be able to invent new drugs in order to cure many diseases such as cancer, heart diseases and so on… That’s because I wasn’t able to help my loved ones who had them when I was younger, sadly, they are not here anymore.

What I was left with was this burning desire to keep trying harder to ensure that my loved ones didn’t die in vain. Each death of my loved one was a fuel to that fire that kept me going. Finally, when I got into Poly, I was beyond overjoyed.

Then I got into my dream specialisation: Medicinal Chemistry Research and the road was tough and made it through so far. The question is: Is it ever gonna be enough?

I spoke with a wise friend who said, I have a purpose to work towards to. She said she wanted to see my name somewhere out in the world. Maybe someday, I will become that medicinal chemist that I want to be.

Not now but someday… My purpose is going to guide me back she said… And just like that I would pick Chemistry over and over again given the chance.

Signing off with newfound optimism,

Muna xoxo

“It’s complicated”

Hi you all,

First things first, ‘Ask Me’ is up again! 😀 Just don’t ask me why.

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This is a really serious post and I really hope it doesn’t offend anyone, I apologise in advance. And Hey, everyone’s entitled to their opinion. I have been crafting this for a month.

Let’s just get serious real quick.

Today I choose to answer one of the questions raised when my ‘Question Muna’ was actually up. This is the question that made want to take it down 😡

The question was: “What are your views on dating in Today’s society? ”

HAHAHAHA, I crafted the answer like a thousand times in my head yet it doesn’t feel right.

I can break my thoughts into one sentence.

I don’t believe in dating.

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Muna, do you know what century we are in? 21st Century and you are telling me you don’t believe in dating. I know lots of people who date and they work out in the end. I do agree that it works for some people.

Partially, it has been the way I have been brought up. Coming from my lineage, dating is just wrong in my parents’ eyes last time la. When I was 8, I still remember I told my mum that I was going to one of my guy friend’s house to return something la, she was like, “He’s not your boyfriend is he?” I said “Well he is a boy. Does that count?” cos I am dumb. Then my mum went, “You cannot have a boyfriend.”

I also didn’t know what that meant okay. I was really dumb last time or let’s call it naive. And that was 12 years ago…

My mum says I can tell if I ever like someone… Is she trying to be my girl pal now? (Note the tremendous change)

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With that said…

I also don’t believe that you can learn everything there is to your life partner or your soulmate just by going out together or even living together.

When you are dating, your other half would always want to put forth their best personality in front, it is a psychological thing. Like who would want to show their worst personalities to someone you are just dating right?

Furthermore, the idea of dating just petrifies me. And here’s why…

You open up to that someone and everything is smooth sailing… But what if one day, your partner decide to break up with you? Then you realise you have actually emotionally invested in this relationship, your emotions will be affected. Then you have to move on, and not both of you will move on at the same rate.

Someone will get hurt…

So, I don’t know by dating you are just gonna go through these repeat cycles maybe? I am not sure.

Eh Muna, what do you know… Have you even loved anyone before?

Once upon a time, I thought I did love someone, I thought so until some time ago. He was perfect in every way, looks and in terms of personality. But close to three years now, nah, it was infatuation. As long as the person seems perfect in your eyes…

No, IT AIN’T LOVE. Love is when you look beyond their imperfections and think, “wow, even though he/she is…. , I think he/she is perfect for me.”

I haven’t really felt that way before if I look back with a clear vision and I am not ashamed of it either.

Moving on…

To answer the question, in today’s society, there are social dating apps that I obviously don’t use. I am totally clueless about how they work. Then, of course, I have no comments about it. It just feels like chivalry is dead. If you like a girl, why would you just swipe right, bruh?

That’s all you gonna do? I feel that when you like someone, man up and tell them, right?

Technology is advanced but cmon like them tell them. Simple as that, maybe 5 years down the road, you are married with two kids? HAHAHA.

To all the single people out there who feel that they need to date to fit in… Nope, you are cool and here’s why.

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That’s all I wanna say about dating in this era. If I continue further, everyone’s gonna trash me.

 

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Nope, not gonna be Cady Heron today.

 

Side note: I just realised how I thought my senior was actually my cousin on Clash Royale and kept trying to challenge to friendly battle .-. #latenightconfessions

That’s all people! Byeeee!

Muna xoxo

How to stay safe in the CyberWorld (Muna’s Edition)

Hiiiii,

Happy New year guys! This is the first post of the year! While I’m dealing with my jealousy about something…

YES, I get jealous sometimes.

Is it a cue to play a song about Jealousy? 😼

You all are probably like who is she to comment about this especially since what happened last July…

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Well, I learnt my lesson well enough to preach it. Since last July, I have picked up a few things about the cyber world especially if you are like me… a Naive little girl…

You’ll know this girl bothered me via the internet, to me it was a good lesson. The people who enter your life are either a blessing or a lesson. What triggered this post was this annoying dude on league who kept pestering me for my real name or for my Facebook. I think to see how I look like?

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Yes, that’s what I exactly told him. #HowIbrozonepeople

Then I blocked him…

The important thing is that everything you put on the internet can come back to bite you in the back somehow.

So…

5 Tips to be aware of when you make online friends

  • NEVER EVER EVER give them your real name.

There were many instances where people practically bugged me about my real name. Like dude, my name is super unique and with one search, you’d know who I am.

 

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I know right?

  • Distance yourself from them if they are getting on your nerves

You have the right to walk away from people you don’t wanna interact with.

 

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You don’t need someone who makes you uncomfortable

  • NEVER EVER give them your number, email or any other personal contact information

Like what if they are super stalkerish and they will bother you when you least expect it? Like what if they actually fly down or come down to your house to bother you? This is why don’t be naive.

  • You could have a gaming email and a gaming Skype like I do

I’m totally fine if it is the Skype call, I mean they can’t trace you based on your voice right? I mean I don’t even think I left my country there.

  • Keep your life more private

Everything you post on the internet is gonna be there forever somehow due to caching and stuff I feel (Trying to sound like an IT expert).

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So if you decide to post it on the internet, remember the whole world can see it. None of my accounts is private because I feel somehow people will be able to see it anyway.

You can private your account but I feel people can still see it? Especially Instagram, if you click on a link from Twitter, you can even see it without signing in. Mind you, this person’s Instagram is private, so you get what I mean.

That’s all for now and sorry for the delay from last week so this week, there will be two posts instead of just 1. HAHAHA. I am trying okay?

Byeeee

Signing off,

Muna